Places few Christians are ever found ...

I have been doing informal research for years, poking my nose in places that few Christians are ever found, without compromising myself as a Christ-follower.  One of the most fascinating places is the smoking room/terrace/balcony/cafe/bar/ especially in and around airports.  It is the ultimate concentration of non-christian world travelers and a great representation of the world as a whole; although lately it seems to be leaning toward Asians and Eastern Europeans who apparently smoke more frequently as a whole, than the basic Westerners do.

The conversations that flow in these places is so different and so not-church oriented, as to seem like I have landed on a strange and unusual planet that has never had contact with the Christ-following world.  They talk about business, culture, politics, sex and life in a complete spiritual vacuum.  Everything is generally aimed at being humorous and clever when talking about these topics above, while being curiously transparent and honest when referring to the self in any way. I conclude from this that smokers as a group are very genuine when expressing their understandings about themselves and families, and very self-depreciating about cultural subjects in general.  They understand that they are not experts in all the issues at play and their positions reveal that while they have a position, they are not defined nor confined by their current understandings.

I would argue that we Christ-followers have much to learn about how to dialogue about ourselves and life in general from the culture at large, perhaps especially from this hyper-Christ-absent segment.  One of the things that I have begun monitoring is how people perceive me in these areas, versus the general Christ-following population.  Do people perceive me to be genuine and transparent, or do they perceive me to be self-righteous and judgmental?  Do they perceive me to be willing to enter into real dialogue about world issues or do they perceive me as believing myself to be right about all matters?

I think these are critical differences between the non-praying world and the praying world.  What would Jesus do indeed, and where might we find Him on a sunny afternoon in the Istanbul airport?

So sick

Every keystroke hurts.  Every muscle and joint hurts.  My ribs and abdominal muscles are in agony.  My head hurts so bad, thoughts are running along pain nerves.  All day in pain waiting for the next retch. It is horrible what a microscopic virus can do to your body and the manner in which it does it.  But there is great value in this, two specific lessons everyone needs to learn and keep uppermind as they stroll through life.

One is the fragility of life.  This one is more difficult for the young than those who are growing older or those who feel the full heavy weight of age.  When you are young, indestructible is the word that best fits the minds of this group. There is generally just so little pain as a part of their lives, that they almost have to generate it.  I once asked a Ph.D. psychologist why young people were cutting themselves?  She answered, "so that they know they are alive."  Different lessons are coming in the future decades of life for this group.  Stages that we have all gone through in one form or another.

Two is that no matter how healthy and strong you are, it only takes a small event (bug, virus, ecoli, muscle pull, back strain, car accident, etc) to bring you to a startling halt.  This one always surprises me because I am very fit and strong, especially for someone my age.  But one small event can bring the strongest of us to our knees and completely humble us..

I guess these two lessons are the different sides of the same coin, that we are all weaker than we suppose.  But I believe the converse is also true, that we are far stronger than we know, and it is these weakest moments which help me revel in the strong.

On a cool evening by the lake

In the USA, it is a holiday called Labor Day.  September 2, 2013 has morphed into a cool evening by lake Ohrid after a beautiful day of relaxing. With a ipad mini combined with a bluetooth keyboard and a wonderful slow burning cigar, it has turned into an evening with loads of inspiration and possibilities.  What I can create, write, think, build, connect, produce literally has few limitations.

It is not work, yet it is productive.  We sometimes call it vacation, a break, a holiday, a day off or a change of pace.  I call it wonderful and special.  It is a wonderful byproduct of where I live and what I get to do.  Hopefully it will inspire someone else to spread their wings and explore all the possibilities of their potential and context.  It is all part of a new way of thinking and being.

http://beforeitsnews.com/opinion/2013/09/the-thinking-habit-that-changed-my-life-2445848.html

Unplugged

There are few things in life as a complete change of pace, to re-energize everything you do.  You need and want to have this change of pace.  In fact, it should be the first thing you place on your annual calendar each year.  If you don't put it on the calendar then the chances are very very high that you will NOT get this change of pace that your psyche and your innovating brain cells so desperately need.

You say that you don't have time for vacation, or a change of pace or a break.  That you are entirely too busy to even seriously consider it.  Some of you would argue that such breaks are more work than staying hard at work.  Some of you would suggest that the grind of returning after such a break is more difficult than not going at all.

I would say to you that you cannot afford to not take this break.  The cost of NOT doing this is far higher than you can feel or see on a day to day basis.  There is a large body of research backing this up, and my own testing in this area is amazingly consistent.  The more breaks you factor into your work day and your annual work schedule the more creative, productive and innovative you can actually be hour after hour, day after day.  

Timothy Ferris first tweaked my brain about this some 7 years ago in his blockbuster, "The 4 Hour Work Week".  While I neither need nor want a 4 Hour Work Week, the productivity that can be achieved with the right balance of breaks and focused high intensity work, is consistently far more and far better than I produced in my two decades of 70 hour work weeks.  In fact I am aiming toward, and slowly reconstructing my work cycle to be: personal development for the first third of the work day, intense production in the second third of the day, and slow percolating of ideas and relationships in the final third of the day.  I am consistently amazed at the quality of what I can create now.

This requires (demands) regular unplugging - from the internet, email, phone, media, news, computer, ipad, keyboard, itunes, ipod and any other form of connectedness.  It demands moments of quiet, peace, deep breaths, and change of pace.  After your heart rate settles, your blood pressure falls, you can ask yourself, "What beautiful thing can I create or produce now" as you transition back to full intensity.  Unplug now.

http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/09/01/disruptions-more-connected-yet-more-alone/

(http://www.thedailymuse.com/lifestyle/help-i-cant-relax-6-smart-tips-to-beat-work-anxiety/)

The difference of being in charge

Last night was a total disaster.  Everything that could go wrong did.  Even worse than you can imagine, everything was completely horrible.  And it did not bother me too much at all.  Much to my colleagues surprise, I did not get upset, frustrated, bent out of shape, angry, or emotional.  While it was mildly irritating that so much could happen wrong (that was preventable), it did not affect me all that much.  I simply was relaxed and enjoyed each person and each moment.

What was the difference?  Only this; I was not responsible for the outcomes.  That changed everything.  Everything!  When you are responsible for the outcomes, when you have to answer for the results, when the buck stops with you, then the disaster unfolding around you takes on terrifying purportions. You can see all the potential failures lurking in every moment and event. You can feel the pressure building around you, and you know that certainty of premonition that comes to every catastrophe. Everything has gone horribly wrong.

But when you know that this is not your responsibility, that you face no penalty for this disaster, when no one can point at you and say, "you failed" then the pressure miraculously disappears.  What if we could learn to lead in a groove where we were responsible for the outcomes, yet had the maturity and grace and presence, where our real and actual feelings and reactions were as if we did not?  I am not there yet.

Only two??

I like international travel less and less, the more and more I do of it.  Today's (and yesterdays) travel was more of the same.  All three flights delayed, and while I am thrilled that they organized themselves to all be delayed like that, the stress was painful, and my back was in pain from those seats both in the aircraft and in the airports.  It is like a torture-specialist designed them all.

So on this last leg of the trip today (and yesterday), a curious thing happened.  As the plane was taking off (finally!) two rows in front of me, the three occupants in that row, had the oxygen masks from the compartment overhead, dropped down.  Yes I was surprised that they actually are there too!  Not only are they there, but they drop down just the way they do in the safety video you laboriously watch over and over and over.

But that is not the most curious thing.  Once we reached an altitude where the airline staff was allowed to get up and move about, they all immediately came to this row, two rows in front of me, and basically accused the three passengers of tampering with the system!  Of course they had not, it just dropped down about a 100 meters into the flight.  None of the flight attendants were able to get the oxygen masks back into the compartment.  Eventually they relocated all three of those folks to other seats, and the co-pilot himself came back and worked on this project for the whole flight . . . eventually duck taping the compartment closed.

But that was not the most curious thing.  The absolute most curious thing was . . . that there were only two masks.

Tiger balm is an oxymoron.

Tiger balm is an oxymoron.  Because if you used this stuff on a tiger, it would be anything but a balm, or a calm experience.  Tiger Balm is the Asian equivalent of icy hot (if you are under 50 years old) or Ben Gay (if you are older).  But here, these are all home-made remedies and vary greatly in quality and strength.

Three days ago I hurt my back.  And it wont quit hurting!  So I have been asking my massage therapist to put some Tiger Balm on my back as I am getting my muscles crunched.  The first two days were the seriously tepid variety of Tiger Balm.  I could barely tell she was using anything other than the oil, had it not been for the menthol smell.  Today though, we had an altogether different experience.

I could tell the moment she opened the little bottle that this was not the same stuff she had been using.  Just a few drops and it was like someone napalmed my back!  And then she rubbed it in hard!  And it just got hotter.  She eventually had to go wash her hands, because it was so hot for her!  Then she added a few more drops, and used the edge of a towel to spread it evenly.  I was sweating and melting!  But it was awesome for my back muscles because whatever had been tight was not now.  Then she added a few more drops for good measure.  I sure wish I had some with me right now in this airline seat!

Success is ...

According to David Kidder . . . (Success is) when you have discovered your innate gift or proprietary contribution to the world and you are spending all your time in that strength and almost none of your time in your area of weakness. (I got this tidbit from a Drake Baer blog)

I don't know many people who get to spend all of their time in this strength zone, and who have the freedom of avoiding working out of their weakness at least some of the time.  In fact most of my work revolves around challenging people to identify their "innate gift or proprietary contribution to the world" - what their best contribution can be, what value they can deliver, what they can best create, innovate or build.  Most people are so focused on paying the bills, that just stopping and asking themselves these questions is a huge challenge.

But just because it is tough, doesn't mean we can allow ourselves the luxury of failure here.  It is far too important, both to the world we live in that God created, and to our own sense of purpose and contribution.  I am getting there.  Hopefully I am helping you get there too.

The pressure cooker

I have been in the pressure-cooker recently for some leadership decisions with a client organization. One of their affiliates wants to leave and go to an organization that can provide them with the services, relationships and connections that they need. They failed to provide those things, so it is rational and logical to expect the affiliate to move to an organization which says it can. Now whether or not they actually can deliver those values, remains to be seen.

What I discovered from this recent event is, that my client simply does not believe that 1. they have failed to deliver these values, 2. they don't believe this second organization will be any better, and 3. they are angry with me for not giving them a chance “to talk the affiliates into staying.” Folks, when you have to talk people into staying with your organization, church or social network, you have already lost them.

Let me say this more brutally, if you provide them with the value they need, they will not look elsewhere. There simply is no reason to look elsewhere when I have what I need. Now of course there is some generalization here, but overall the principle is true. So instead of asking “how could we have provided what they needed?” or “if we could do it over again (because you are everyday) what would/could we do better to deliver the value that people need?” they start laying blame, yelling, being angry at the messenger. Seriously poor responses, which only go to blatantly show that yes, they do NOT deliver value for their dollar/investment/affiliates.

If you want to keep your talent, you have to provide them real and actual reasons to stay with you. Said another way, the onus is on the organization/group/club/church to be such an organization, that people WANT to work with you. Provide real value!

Rocks and hard places

Rocks and hard places are fairly negative places to get stuck between. They push and poke and hurt and bruise and if you hit them hard enough, break things. Two competing opportunities, two apparently equal paths to choose, two or three family pressures, a number of financial setbacks, a group of needs yet unmet, more commitments than you can meet, age and desire, wants and resources, needs and wishes - all can become hard places and rocks when they happen in tandem.

My sweet bride and I face this dilemma right now. She greatly prefers to live in Eastern Europe, while I greatly prefer living in Asia. A rock and a hard place. She wants (and has) location-specific work with face to face people involvement. I want (and have) work that I can do remotely and have a long reach across the world and can pinpoint specific projects and leaders and situations. A rock and a hard place. She is very accomplished in hard skills that make her unique in her working field. I have education and experience that makes me unique in my working field. A rock and a hard place.

So currently we are doing both/and and neither. I know, that sounds impossible, but we often accomplish that and more. But I am not sure it is sustainable because the rocks and the hard places are a damn sight tougher than our wills it seems. Having your cake and eating it too not only rarely happens, but its costly.

I am confident that you have faced a rock and a hard place situation(s), and am equally confident that you will face more in the future, just we have and will. A great deal of dialogue and compromise are required to navigate these rocks and hard places so that damage is minimal (or at least contained) and forward progress can be sustained.

Continuity and Action

Today has been one of those days, where I am more the student with a learning curve, than I am the leadership guru guy directing a meeting. Those are always the richest days!

The first lesson that I learned today is that action trumps qualifications and experience. Most of my life has been spent gaining qualifications and experience. and granted, I am good at what I do. But Jimmy and Megan taught me an important lesson today - action is superior to becoming overqualified to compensate for my occasional insecurities.

I met Jimmy last year, barely a Christian at all, freshly divorced, all at the tender age of 24! I was being called in as an emergency to head off a new disaster, he was planning to jump right into a second marriage! We had a number of good long talks and finally agreed that a slightly longer engagement than three months, (less than six months after his divorce) was a wise and prudent course of action. Of course there are a million other details here, but lets jump to the present in favor of saving some time. I met Mrs Jimmy, Megan, who is a sharp and sassy gal.

They are back in Asia, and have just signed a two year contract to teach at a school here in the heart of Asia. They would never meet the qualifications to work for my non-profit, The Leadership Development Group. Nor would they meet the basic qualification of any of the parent organizations that I have worked for in my adult life. But you know what, they just don't care. They have seen a need, and no matter how at risk they are as a couple, as Christians, as people - they have dove right in and committed themselves.

I know all the arguments, having made them myself many times, but there is something special about people of action. Action born not out of hard competencies or deep confidence or high qualifications. Action that is born out of a heart for the needy and the disadvantaged. We need more Jimmys and Megans in the world!

The second thing I learned today, is that a certain level of continuity is required to sustain significant relationships. I have written about Dunbar's number before, and that is a key factor related to HOW MANY relationships one can actually sustain. But the reality is, that if you don't keep a certain level of consistency and continuity going in a relationship, even if you haven't hit Dunbar's number yet, you still can't have a significant relationship with that person - the capacity may be present, but the effort hasn't been applied.

I had a meeting today with Adam. I like Adam. I see him 5-6 times a year. We enjoy one another. We have real potential to have a significant friendship that would benefit us both. But neither of us make the necessary effort between those times we see each other. The consequences of that failure is a stilted ineffective face to face time, where we meet more because we think we should, rather than out of any real synergy, connection or purpose. In fact Adam and I could quite possibly change this part of the world together — but we need to pay the price to make that happen.

Which brings us full circle to action again. What Adam and I need is more action together and more effort, in order to create something beautiful, innovate a high impact micro-enterprise, start a new ministry among the 20-somethings of Chiang Mai, change the world, or simply be better people because we listened to Nike in this case — just do it!

The center of things

The center of things is really important. Take for instance my back.  Its killing me! Every. Single. Movement. Hurts.  

Thats because the center of things, the spine right above your bottom, is the fulcrum of the body. No action can take place without involving that center of things.

Your heart.  It is another kind of center of things.  No devotion can happen.  No inspiration can occur.  The best and the hardest of life all pass through this center of things.  Most important here is your connection and relationship to the Living Savior

Your commitment. We are committed to many things, but not what we usually think we are committed to.  I see this all the time.  People tell me that they are committed to this or committed to that, but when I observe their daily actions, I see what they are really committed to, really.  This center of things is what I DO.  It is my daily actions that produce something.  All too often it can be all about me . . . regardless of what I SAY.

The value you provide.  This center of things is critical to my emotional wellbeing.  It is purpose.  It is making a difference. When we have meaningful work to accomplish and we do it well, there is nothing quite like it.  It can so be, a life well lived.  Not measured by longevity, but rather impact and significance.

The goal is to keep these centers healthy, unstrained, toned, exercised, in great shape, so that you can live a remarkable life, one of effortless and powerful purpose.

Saying no

Perhaps the most difficult thing in the whole world is saying no. There are a multitude of reasons this is true. For most people, it just seems so impolite and unaffirming, both of which are socially pricy and emotionally uncomfortable. For others it is societal pressure which keeps them from saying no. They don't feel like they actually can say no, perhaps because of WHO is asking them, maybe a boss, or maybe co-worker who has been helpful in the past, or maybe it is a family member who genuinely needs assistance (even if you are the wrong person to deliver that assistance).

For others it is difficult to say no because of the threat of lost opportunity. I am facing one of those situations myself right now. I have a great opportunity to expand my business. I could have 14 new clients just handed to me! Moreover, lots of leeway and discretion in how I would approach their development and the implementing of that development process with each of them. So on paper, in the abstract, it seems like I really need to scarf this gift up right away and not look too closely at the dental work, right?

Well maybe. It really IS an opportunity. An opportunity to become the irrefutable best at what I do. An opportunity to learn. An opportunity to be a star. An opportunity to sharpen my skills and systems and processes. An opportunity to expand our brand, and extend our reach. It truly is all of those things. But the tricky thing is that each opportunity in life has it's own price.

It seems that many of the leaders I work with have a very difficult time holding the “price” in their mental focus for the very necessary period of time, until, you feel the full weight of that price. Many are blinded so badly by the “opportunity” and all the potentials that it brings, that it appears nearly impossible for them to entertain the real and certain “price”. The price of my 14 new clients is that they are immature train wrecks in many ways - i.e. problems, challenges, high maintenance, etc, etc. The opportunities are not a sure bet, but the “price” is definite.

Saying no is difficult because of the seduction of scale over quality. Saying no is often impossible because of pressures, needs, wants, desires, wishes and the Santa Claus effect, that can only see the opportunity, and can never quite grasp, weigh, consider, think through and have great clarity about the price.

Heart stopping surprise

This morning started out normal enough. I got up and prepared myself for my morning bike ride. After stretching out and doing crunches, I was preparing to turn off the air conditioner before I went out for my ride. I had my finger on the off button, when the entire balcony lit up with tremendous arcs of electricity. The flash of electricity and the tremendous noise was overwhelming. Somehow I thought I had blown up my air conditioner compressor which was on my balcony. This blinding flash scared me so badly, I dropped the air conditioning remote. I shielded my eyes and covered my ears. I was certain my brand-new air conditioner had just exploded to Smitherins. Then the power went completely out on the entire block.

After recovering my wits a little bit, I realize that my air conditioner had not exploded. Instead one of the local transformers had melted down and arced tremendously. Needless to say everyone in the entire condominium was now awake whether they wanted to be or not.

The adrenaline jolt for me personally was a real shock to my system. For 30 seconds I was convinced that I had caused the entire explosion. But I had nothing to do with it. It only seemed that way because the proximity of my finger on the power off button of the air conditioning remote.  The synergy of that moment of touching the off button and the arcs of blinging electricity convinced me that I had "done it".  But I hadn't.

Now if I only knew what the lesson I should learn from this is . . . .

Even guys like me

Mondays. Since I don't work in a typical office nor on a typical schedule nor on typical hourly structures, Monday is usually just an abstract to me. Most weeks find me working on all seven days, so Monday is a non-issue. Nor is there a hump day nor a weekend. All in all I love it.

But occasionally a day happens that is totally Mondayish and it actually happens to be on a Monday even! Any day that finds me facing the temptation to use swear words in three languages before 8:00 am is not starting well. It is the rainy season in Asia, and that means … well it rains. Often. Frequently. Mostly several times a day. Occasionally all day. Amazingly it can be sunny and then 15 minutes later you can be in the middle of a 5 minute downpour (which just as well be a one hour downpour in terms of how soaking wet you get).

So when you go outside in the rainy season, you take especially made plastic bags with you to protect your phone from water damage. While you may have never heard of such a thing in the West, here in the subtropics you certainly have - they are a basic requirement of life. At the very least electronic life. Of course this morning on my way out to exercise, I forgot. No worries though, the sky was clear … until I reached the mountain.

Then the sprinkle started, and then the fog and heavy clouds rolled in, and then the rain started in earnest … the one and only morning I forgot my protection bag!! So I had to cut my workout short, and race back to shelter. Except of course, you can't race anywhere on a wet road and a bicycle. So in truth, I slowly desperately fought my way back to shelter, as fast as I dared. Thankfully, all electronics survived!

Finally get back to my room, get my soggy clothes off and hung up, including my soaked shoes, get a hot shower, gather some important letters that need to go out before I have to go to my morning meeting and start my work plans for the day in another city. So I am at the post office 5 minutes before it was scheduled to open at 10:00 am. My meeting was scheduled to start at 10:30 - 10:45. At 10:30, after waiting for 35 minutes, no postal worker has yet shown up to open the post office and so I raced off to my meeting.

I arrived on-time for my meeting, but the others were late! It is not even 11:00 am and as of yet nothing has gone well or as planned. It did not get any better throughout the day, including the elephant camp, the rain (again), the shopping with my guest, our dinner, etc, etc, etc, etc. Yes, sometimes Mondays even happen to guys like me. At least the writing is better than therapy.

Difficult decisions

As a leadership consultant and CEO, I have a number of pet concepts that have withstood the test of time. My number one concept is, “Under promise, over deliver.” You see plenty of that idea in many of my blogs. Another one, no less common unfortunately but far less inspiring is, “Someone has to be the adult.” My kids especially hate it when I pull that one out, but the leaders I work like it no more than the kids.

But it is oh so true. Everyone wants to be a leader, but almost no one wants to make leadership level decisions. Because they are always difficult decisions. Decisions that no one wants to make. Heck if they were easy, someone would have already made the decision! The non-leaders can be as reckless and immature as they want, but the leaders, they have to do the right thing for the right reason without any luxury of what he or she wants. Difficult decisions. Someone has to be the adult. If you are the leader, that would be you.

Maintenance moments?

Thank God for maintenance! Today was my 6000 kilometer service for my motorcycle. I needed what this brought, all apart from the oil and filter. 

The maintenance service forced me to sit, be still, and work. I needed it badly. Although it is not like I had been avoiding it or anything, just the busyness of the day, guests, schedules, urgency of the moment, email, demands, rain, distractions of the day, everything taking longer to accomplish than allotted, competing agendas and desires, etc, etc, simply derailed me completely from focused concentrated work.

Take advantage of those enforced times of maintenance, whether it is the Honda shop or the Midas muffler shop or a flight or road trip or waiting in line or any minutes where you are forced to be patient and wait - can serve as a great opportunity for an inspirational moment.

Making babies

What a satisfying day at "work".  I can't imagine that anyone has a job like mine.  Its a location-less job, with a long long reach.  Today I am physically in Chiang Mai Thailand in Southeast Asia.  The part of my work that was so satisfying today was in the Ukraine.

There in Ukraine are young Tolic and Sveta.  They are both very physically handicapped.  They both grew up in Ukrainian state orphanages.  Then they did the unimaginable - they got married!  And still, even though married, as all "graduates" from State orphanages do in the Slavic world, they were sent to the Old Folks Home when they turned 18 and by law must leave the orphanage.  The only other option they had was to go live in a State Psychiatric Hospital. 

As married couples usually do, they made a baby. The State terminated their pregnancy.  They got pregnant again, and this time they are fighting hard to keep this child.  (this pic is of Sveta at 7 months) We are moving them out of the old folks home, so that they can keep the baby.  But the logistics are daunting and overwhelming and there are just so many factors to consider.  But a new baby, a new creation of God, is certainly worth all the effort.

The trials of Mr Tsa

I can't believe how naive I am sometimes.  I mean, don't you just ASSUME that others will treat you like they want to be treated?  Don't YOU treat others the way you expect to be treated? Surely I can't be in the minority here!  But there is something amiss in my la-la land.

At first I thought it was just a wild anomaly.  While we were getting a foot massage the other evening, three girls, jumped up and run off without paying 3/4 of the way into their foot massage!  Girls!  Foreigners who obviously had enough thousands of dollars to get here in the first place, ripping off people who are not certain of having enough money to buy their one meal of the day.  The poorest of the poor.  I thought it was an anomaly.  I was wrong.

Today I was sitting on a tiny little stool in Mr Tsa bicycle shop, about four inches off the floor, watching Mr Tsa replace the spoke I had broken earlier in the morning.  Five brawny American and Aussie boys (20 somethings) returned with their rental bikes.  The bikes had clearly been in the mud and offroad, although their contract with Mr Tsa expressly forbid that.  These were the cheapest of the rentals, for city use only, costing a $1.65 per day.

Mr Tsa informed the boys that were going to have to pay extra, in order to have the bikes detailed again, so that he would be able to rent the bikes to the next customers.  They protested strongly against the $1.25 cleaning fee assessed against each bike.  In the conversation that followed, Mr Tsa informed me that if I had not been there, things might have gone very badly for him indeed.  He then proceeded to tell me of how many times rich foreigners regularly lied, cheated, damaged, abused and generally did not behave in any manner in which to inspire confidence in the human race, to him and his business over the years.  I asked him what percentage took advantage of him overall.  He replied, "about 50% good like you, and about 50% bad, or worse, like them."  I was ashamed for all Westerners who I see here, giving us all a bad name.  I think I probably have to do 10 righteous acts, to counter a single bad apple in the mix.

The biggest irony for me, is that these people ripping off the poorest in south east Asia are the Millennial's - the most justice minded generation ever.  Maybe they should start with a dose of simple human decency and compassion before they yell at the rest of us to save the world.

Warm steady breeze

How are you doing setting the ambience for your best work?  For me a warm steady breeze works best.  Warm because I don't want to be cold and steady because I don't want to get too hot.  A warm steady breeze in my workflow happens like this.

It blows between things.  Between other events and appointments throughout the day.  There is no happy hour of creating or innovating or thinking.  It doesn't happen every day between 4-6 pm.  It more often occurs after my session with my physiotherapist, before my scheduled meeting with my boss.  Between those things.  30 minutes here, an hour there, intentional for sure (i.e. steady), but between other stuff.

Its warm all the time.  There is always a back burner seeing the world through a particular set of eyes, that can draw a metaphor for life that is worth living.  Its always warm.  Its always on.  There is no effort to it,  It doesn't take a ton of energy nor attention.  Just a percolating slightly all the time. Its always warm and slowly cooking something good up.

And often, it is actually a warm steady breeze, for real.  Like at this very moment, my "office" is the rooftop of my building, and its about 3000 square ft, with a killer view, internet, can enjoy my cigar, and there is a constant perfect warm breeze blowing out of the south.  A moment to create and think and innovation and build and develop.  Its an accelerant for the mind and heart.  And about the time the cigar ends, I will have to go back to the scheduled and planned and have a conversation with the boss . . . but the warm steady breeze was a golden moment. 

Being THERE versus BEING there

Some jobs need you to be fully present, on location, there in the flesh.  That is the primary reason I stepped down recently as the pastor of the International Church in Skopje.  I needed to BE there, and I couldn't.  Other jobs require you to be fully present mentally and emotionally, but not physically. That is the job I have now.  People still need me to be present, but they need my attention, my focus, my experience, my skills . . . but they don't actually need me to BE there.

These different types of jobs (and there is a whole scale of jobs between these two extremes) are equally important, equally impactful, and equally difficult, just in completely different ways. Please hear me well, I am in no way diminishing the critical nature of being a Pastor, nor the difficulty of that job.  I should know, as I have held that job in one fashion or another for most of my adult life.

But the locationless job I have now is fascinating to me.  As my dear sweet wife pointed out to me, I am very particularly wired to do this and do it well.  My steady high scores and evaluations year after year, echo her belief.  I have accomplished some significant work this week in Ukraine, Czech Republic, Bulgaria, Macedonia, Cambodia, and Myanmar.  I have helped save babies, teach church planting, been invited to teach, assess, create and develop.  And all this and more, while physically being in Thailand the entire time.

So whether your value is created be BEING there or by being THERE, make sure you don't allow anything to stop you from being awesome.

You are being measured by metrics that you are not even aware of today.

The lady cooking my breakfast doesn't understand that speed or time is one of the most critical factors for Westerners. I can get a better breakfast far quicker at the neighboring store.  Why would I come back here? The desire for variety is often the only reason we even try a new place.  But you get measured by previous experiences.

Every church you visit has a very specific measuring tape.  You won't even know what that tape consist of until you have been there for a while. Trust me, they are taking your measure . . . just as you are taking theirs. 

Every job has metrics, and always only some of them are stated.  Your boss is the one who gets to interpret those metrics and while you may be exceeding all the stated evaluation points, you might not even rank on his/her understanding of those metrics. (I personally have had a number of uplines who use a variable measuring rod, and who interpreted the rules differently for each individual.  Impossible to succeed in such a situation.)

But you have choices.  If you are the business person trying to win my business or loyalty or return, you can query me to see how you did.  While the breakfast lady prompted this blog today, I honestly DID keep an open mind until I saw the breakfast and realized that it took less than three minutes to prepare, and I waited almost 15.  If you are the one searching for a new church or club group, you can stay, leave, or commit to change yourself or them or any combination of these options.  If the job is the focus, you can stay, change, grow, submit or leave, and once again, there are a number of combinations of these options depending on the situation.  But you do have options, let no one lead you to believe otherwise.

I took far too long in life to own up to this fact.  I stayed in a job with a certain company far too long.  And when circumstances finally forced me, forced me, to change and take the option that I could not contemplate previously, is when I was finally set free.  The scale and scope of my accomplishments since making the change, far exceed my previous production, in a third of the time.  Yes you are being measured by metrics you aren't even aware of, yet you have options and choices.

Extending your reach

I am really feeling the need to write these days.  Recently I opened my blogger account and what I discovered was a little disconcerting.  In 2006 and 2007, I posted a blog just about every other day.  But then came 2008 - only 16 for the whole year.  Then 2009 - only 3. Then 2010 - only 3. Then 2011 - only 1 Then 2012 - only 0.

Did I produce anything during those years?  Well actually I did.  But I got away from the discipline of systematically putting the work down in a place where it could be consumed, read, where it had the possibility of helping someone else, changing a life, building someone up, teaching an important concept or principle.  In reality blogging for someone like me - in a thinking job - is accountability.  A metric that can be seen and, well, measured.

Now I am using Evernote to track my touches with clients around the world, Feedly (at the moment but looking for something better) to research now that google reader is gone, Drafts for writing all content, because it is perfect on the mobile devices that I use, and I can then chose over 20 other actions with whatever I write, and back to blogger to publish the best content.  The challenge of a thinking job is that no one else but me will hold me accountable for producing something of value.  And we all need to bring value into the lives of others and into our work.  We all need to extend our reach.

Work in the real and virtual world

Some jobs need you to be fully present, on location, there in the flesh.  That is the primary reason I stepped down recently as the pastor of the International Church in Skopje.  I needed to BE there, and I couldn't.  Other jobs require you to be fully present mentally and emotionally, but not physically. That is the job I have now.  People still need me to be present, but they need my attention, my focus, my experience, my skills . . . but they don't actually need me to BE there. 

 These different types of jobs (and there is a whole scale of jobs between these two extremes) are equally important, equally impactful, and equally difficult, just in completely different ways. Please hear me well, I am in no way diminishing the critical nature of being a pastor, nor the difficulty of that job.  I should know, as I have held that job in one fashion or another for most of my adult life. 

 But the locationless job I have now is fascinating to me.  As my dear sweet wife pointed out to me, I am very particularly wired to do this and do it well.  My steady high scores and evaluations year after year, echo her belief.  I have accomplished some significant work this week in Ukraine, Czech Republic, Bulgaria, Macedonia, Cambodia, and Myanmar.  I have helped save babies, teach church planting, been invited to teach, assess, create and develop.  and all this and more, while physically being in Thailand the entire time.

So whether your value is created by BEING there or by being THERE, make sure you don't allow anything to stop you from being awesome.

Day Four

Synergy. I am no longer sure that this is something you can plan for nor design. The last two days would be a perfect example. Yesterday was a day from hell. Everything that could go wrong did. It started out that way right after my workout. I had time to start a quick load of laundry before my appointment. So I did.

As soon as the load finished and I popped the lid up, I knew I was in trouble. The tangled mess of cables told me that I had washed my ipod along with my workout clothes! A soaking wet ipod is never a good thing. After placing my ipod in a small bowl of isopropyl alcohol, and then in a cup of uncooked rice to start the drying process, I headed to the internet company's office to complain about being without connectivity for the last two days.

The very nice Thai lady informed me that a technician would be calling me soon. He did and determined that the modem had failed. So I packed up the modem, and headed back across town to the internet office to exchange the modem. She politely informed me that I would have to go to the TP-Link office. So I did. There a miraculous repair took place. I happily took my now repaired modem home. It worked for a bit more than 60 seconds before it reverted to the same problem as before.

This time I jumped on my bicycle and headed right back over to the TP-Link office and asked him to exchange the modem. He said he would. He lied. Long story short, there was no exchange, although they went through an elaborate charade to make it seem that it had happened. It took quite some time to pull off. Then off and on my unsuspecting way home, I had a bicycle moment, where my legs and gears were not synchronize at all. Lots of pain and blood resulted. Insult to injury was when I got home and the modem worked about 60 seconds.

All that pain for nothing. And I have spared you the details. In spite of all that energy that I was expending to get stuff moving, no synergy was happening at all.

Fast forward one morning more, and the AC guy, AND the internet guy, both show up at the same time, ONE HOUR EARLY, which is the Asian equivalent of a lunar landing, and viola, both my internet and my AC are getting done - synergy happening in droves today.

My take away is that I don't know when to stop spending my energy recklessly and uselessly, and I don't know when to sit back and let it happen. I need to pay attention to the cultural flows and ebbs, as well as take a serious chill pill. Then I may shed less blood and experience less pain, than trying to generate something out of nothing.

Day Three

Day three. Priorities. Or you could think of it as triage. That's a great word. I learned that word while studying to be an EMT 27 years ago. Triage is what you do when you have multiple patients at the same time, all needing care from you. Which one gets treatment first?

The most critically injured patient gets treatment first, right? Well, not always. Sometimes a patient is so critically injured, that they will die no matter what you do because the injury may be beyond your skill, the hospital may be too far, the damage too great, or the cost of treating this patient will cost you the lives of others. Applied to your leadership (and mine), sometimes we have to let a patient (or project or task or relationship) die, in order to save the other 12 people who need attention.

Once we have determined what we need to let go of and release it from our sphere of responsibility, then we need to prioritize the remaining tasks (patients) in order of severity or urgency. In our leadership model or working model, this means that I read my RSS feeds before I do email. Seth Godin points out that answering or responding to something someone thought yesterday, is less important than creating something important or wonderful today.

The point being that I can only experience frustration in the long run if I am unwilling or unable to tackle the most necessary first, rather than the easiest or what I like to do best.

Day Two

This is day two. What are you going to create today? What are you starting, beginning, developing, working on, progressing, furthering, or finishing? Have you found the workflow you need to be creative and wonderful? Have you discovered your best place or environment to set it loose and do? I think the rooftop along with a nice Nicaraguan should do nicely.

Choices is the word of the day. You have to make some choices about how you will spend these hours, what you will produce and how you will go about doing so. And the choices you make, will also dictate that some choices were decided against, at least for today. A choice “for” something is a choice “not for” something other. In other words this morning for breakfast I choose between Dan and Carol's dive versus the corner dive - I can't eat breakfast today at both places, although I could eat at both places over the course of the day. Although by definition one meal would not be breakfast. Again a choice for one is a choice against another.

It gets more complex as we go, because the first choice puts pressure on other choices down the line today. The location of the two breakfast choices this morning would have made very different “coffee” and “workplacetoday” locations possible this afternoon. Choosing one determined if I could also do laundry or not while working. Choosing one over the other determined who I met, saw and worked with throughout the day as well. Not every initial choice has so much impact every day, but it always has impact. Calculating that impact into the first choice of the day is a very important factoring process.

All of these lead to a moment, an hour, a block of time where you produce … something. Often the quality of production, the magic, the value, the importance is highly affected by those previous choices. Choose well.

Thinking - Day One

Thinking, real thinking requires a measure of atmosphere or ambience or view in order to inspire said thinking.  This is true of most people, because the thinking itself is not enough for most folks, enjoyment-wise that is.  Inspiration and thinking go together like chocolate and peanut butter.

Exercise is one way to foment thinking thoughts, as the blood starts gushing hard through the old veins.  And if you can combine atmosphere and exercise together, then you have the makings of a truly solid thinking window.  Above is what a gorgeous Fall morning looks like from my bicycle in Macedonia.

I am always seeking out such spaces in my life, so that I can accomplish the best possible work with the resources that I am capable of each day.

International Travel

It is a bit bumpy on this ride. Riding through wind currents and trade winds and the jet stream at 600 miles an hour can be bumpy. In fact it's making this blog a bit difficult to write, or at least difficult to hit the correct keys. Wait a second while I get my seatbelt back on . . . there, that is safer. Hopefully the iPad and the keyboard won't go flying and hit some unfortunately person in the head or something.

But in terms of time, nothing comes close, bumps aside. There is no other way to get from Amsterdam to Atlanta in 8.5 hours. Almost 5000 miles and most of the folks were complaining. They should try swimming next time, or even using a jet ski or ship or submarine, and they would quickly find that KLM is a far superior option in the big scheme of things. Now if only I was one of those people who could sleep for hours and hours on a plane, that would be outstanding! Make an astounding stretch of distance seem even much shorter!

Spiritual journeys are like International Travel in few ways. There is the exotic food, and perhaps the close proximity to some strange looking and acting people, but spiritual journeys are not about the destination nearly as much as they are about travel itself. The movement from one level of maturity and understanding to an new and different level is the point of a spiritual journey, not always where you are going as much as how you are going. International Travel is about how to get from point A to point B with the least amount of time, money and discomfort possible. Spiritual journeys are about tastes, textures, experiences, failures, growth and maturing. Very different trips indeed. Oh by the way, they both can be quite bumpy at times. Better put on your seatbelt.

The $523.00 meal

It was pretty salty to be honest with you. A month ago I would not have noticed, but know I can really tell, since I have been cutting out almost all salt from my diet. The doctor threatened me with death if I did not get my blood pressure under control, but that is a different story altogether.

So as I was saying the tiny bit of meat with three slices of mushrooms on it, surrounded by gravy on one side and pureed potatoes on the other side, was a really expensive and salty meal. Although I must admit they were serving free wine along with it, to enhance what little nutritional value that might be found somewhere deep in this dish.

The reason I call this the $500+ meal, is that I had to buy this ticket a second time. And it cost four times as much the second time as it did the first time. Competition would be nice. Then these airlines in the hairy armpit places of the world would not have monopolies and be able to charge whatever they want for a given ticket, because more venders would create more options and more options would create an environment where one company would charge less or give more options for the money. Competition always results in lower prices eventually. They don't really know what that is here in Ukraine.

So as I was saying I had already bought this ticket once and now I had to buy again. And I mean HAD to. There is no other way back home. So when you are stuck somewhere because of visa problems, and the only option left to you is to go back the way you came, and there is only one flight going that way, well that places you at the complete and utter ruthlessness of the one selling the ticket. The way I look at it, I basically paid $524 for a very poorly made meal.

Shame on me

This is being written in a rather bad way. I feel terrible because I have been bad-mouthing British Airways and Raptim travel all day . . . and now I find myself sitting in a business class seat -backwards. Yes I said backwards. The reason this is so, and that I am uncomfortably close the man facing the proper direction is that these seats fully recline and the way that they accomplish this is by facing one seat forward and the other one toward the rear.

Worse yet, this is actually my wife's seat. She gave it up for me, because she can't bear the thought of being in business class with all these high-fluting souls who can actually afford these seats. Brenda had what is known as a "forced upgrade" whatever that means. How do you "force" an upgrade? Anyhoo it was totally weird taking facing the rear of the aircraft, but I am glad that I am being forced to do so.

Being able to cross my legs and eventually lay down is such a huge relief. The lack of possible positions in standard coach seats is one of the reasons that long distant travel is so tiring and exhausting. But I feel a little ashamed for talking bad about all these companies and then having such a gift bestowed on me. The moral of this story, don't complain, because you never know what good thing is coming.

Jots of the moment

This is a journal of the moment. At this moment I am sitting in an Indian outdoor cafe on the island of Penang in Malaysia. If that sounds weird to you then you need to understand that 50% of the 800000 people that live on this island are Chinese, 40% are Malay and 10% are Indian. So the Indian food is quite authentic and tasty. I would have enjoyed this meal more, except for the waiter who was fascinated with my iPad and was a serious Apple fanboy, and wanted to talk Mac OS throughout my meal. All I wanted was some peace and quiet and a good meal. The meal I got, the quiet I did not. Sometimes being an early adopter of technology is rather hazardous. But the tandoori chicken was still excellent.

I got to see a disappointingly small amount of Malaysia and the island of Penang. One has to work it seems, and after coming so far, it would had been a pity to have not garnered everything possible from the conference. Yet, it would hzve been more relaxing to have toured a bit.

Two very very short days after my return to Macedonia from Malaysia, I find myself on another flight bound for London. I have no idea what time zone my bod is in, but my watch seems to be swinging wildly from one time zone to the next. In London more of the same sit down and type as fast as I can mode, gaining the material as cogently as possible for digestion at a later date. I hope the food is better than I have been told, and that the beer is as good as promised.

After Paradise where can one go?

For the seventh time in my life, I went to Paradise. Not the Muslim one nor even the Christian one, but rather Paradise, California. Now having lived in four countries and having visited some 30 plus other countries, I think that I can safely said that Paradise is, um, Paradise. All cliché’s aside, Paradise California is a lovely place. It’s always hard to go somewhere well after having been in Paradise for any length of time.

Yet what makes Paradise a paradise is not merely the location nor the vistas nor the mountians nor the lakes nor the rivers nor the wildlife nor the peacefulness of a small wonderful town. It’s the people of Paradise that make Paradise a paradise.

And as I think about the last week of my life in Paradise and all that happened there and all the connections made there and all the incredible people I was blessed to meet, I came to realize that there is a great spiritual lesson here for the church and for the Church. That heaven or the church and eventually the Church will be a heaven or hell or paradise because of the character and integrity of the people that populate it . . . or not. What an indictment to our modern evangelical movement, and what a challenge. After all, once you have been to paradise, you rarely want to go somewhere else.

A culture of self-destruction

There are many many things about American Culture that are fascinating, but this one may take the cake (or kill the constituents) more so than all others. Take the cake in the sense that it is so much more widespread here in North America than elsewhere, or kill the constituents in the sense that this culture of self-destruction is amazingly accomplished or at the very least leads to much of the crime that this country is facing; either way destruction follows closely.

I was having a lovely conversation with my youngest daughter who is one very tough yet compassionate chick (she plays hockey on the varsity BOYS team!). She wants to help everyone she meets. Yet she confessed to me in our lovely conversation this morning (between traveling trips for me, making it all the more important and lovely) that there is not much you can do to help people bent on destruction. People determined to have the most irresponsible sex you can imagine, determined to try every illegal drug available, determined to get high at every opportunity, determined to diminish all morals, determined - we agreed - to self destruct. There is not much you can do to help those bent on self-destruction.

As Sam Levenson’s father told him when he was about five years old, “son, if you ever need a helping hand, there is always one at the end of your arm.” A lesson few seem to know or understand in the modern world and one that I tried to teach my daughter today. Only those who are willing to take some responsibility for their pursuit of self-destruction are potential candidates for help. You can’t help those who aren’t interested in being helped . . . the entire horse and water story in a nutshell. Nor can you change those who are convinced that irresponsibility is the rite of adulthood, as are the vast majority of the high school students in my daughter’s school. Perhaps all high schools?

As I said in my opening volley, these seem to be particularly North American traits, “due to the fall of the traditional family“ as I was told in church this past week. But these matters are not the centerpiece of youth culture in other countries who haven’t had a ”traditional“ family structure for decades. so can we really blame the fall of the traditional for a current culture of self-destruction? I think not. Moreover I think there is a tie-in here to the piercing, tatooing, and now cutting trends seen in the youth cultures of North America. While there are many people out there far more qualified than I to assess these trends, as a father of three teenagers, I think that my understanding carries some small weight and I think these trends come from a society bent of the pursuit of self-expression at the cost of logic and reason. ”We aren’t in the age of logic and reason any longer“ some would quickly say, and for once we would agree. But nevertheless, without a voice of reason in a world of self indulgence, one rarely finds a higher reason for living. Lost is the chance to live ofr others, God, eternity or family. What other possible conclusion can they find then in this world, except out of leisure, wealth and boredom they destroy themselves? A culture of self-destruction indeed.

Tick Tock Tick Tock

The clocks are ticking. Especially here, at my parents house, in the deep country, where the ticking of the clocks are the loudest thing going. I am not talking only about those noisy (relatively) things with pointers that endlessly go round and round either.

Today is my parents 50th Anniversary. That clock has been ticking a long long time, even longer than me! :-) It is a huge milestone that few reach. According to Divorce Magazine.com only 5% of all marriages reach the 50 year mark . . . or another way of viewing that statistic is that 95% of all marriages do not last 50 years. Kudos to my parents, number one for raising me - a most cantankerous child, number two for staying together when it would have been so easy to go their own individual paths. I am humbled and amazed that my folks are so special.

But this morning at 3:18am when I woke up and could not fall back to sleep, I realized that their clock is ticking. Health issues are eroding their quality of life. That clock has now become an enemy of sorts. While they have beaten it by staying together 50 years, it will still win in the end, and it appears much sooner than later.

I also realized that my clock is ticking as well in the quiet of the sleepless night. 47 years old is such a big number . . . to my 16 year old especially, not so big to my parents, and a childishly small number to my grandparents who are almost 90 years old and still pushing cows around with their walking canes. But everything works a little slower than I think it should, heals slower, comes to mind slower, decisions are slower, even my definition of fast is slower. Yes the clock is ticking.

I guess than means it is a good day to make it count. Tick Tock Tick Tock go the loud clocks out in the country . . . make 'em count.

Mileage

Mileage. We all have more of it on us that we would like to admit. But I like old things. Heck, I am an old thing! Everything I own is old, except for my technology:-). My little old house that I bought sight-unseen some 6 years again has some serious mileage on it. It was built in 1895 with square nails, not round ones! My clothes tend to be old too, although not made in 1895! My mother (I am visiting my parents at the moment) grabbed my clothes this morning and dumped them in with her clothes in the washer, while I was yelling, "don't dry my jeans on high heat!" She listened to me thank God, but commented when I returned home, that my jeans are the oldest piece of clothing that she has seen in the last 40 years. The reason that I don't dry them on high heat is because high heat makes all the patches peal off. (Don't feel sorry for me, I could buy new jeans if I wanted :-))
























My oooolllldddd jeep wrangler was reaching some milestones this afternoon on the way back from Carnesville, Georgia (a city that you have never heard of) after trying to do some banking. These mileage photos throughout this post, have been from my old worn out Wrangler which hit a huge milestone, as I pulled off the road into someone's driveway and took this amazing photo this afternoon. Well the photo sucks, but the numbers are impressive.
























Two Hundred Twenty-Two Thousand, Two Hundred Twenty-Two point Two miles. Thats alot of mileage. Not the most that I have ever had on a car that I drove daily (my Toyota Van had 365,000 miles on it and ran like a top. I hated to leave that van in America when we went back overseas), but definitely the most unique number I ever turned over in a car that I drove daily. But what that big number means is that my jeep has lots of character, lots of memories, lots of things that could be fixed, but a keen sense of dependability - that it will get me where I intend to go. I like it and wouldn't trade it for a new one.

My point in this post, is that most folks have a mileage one them, and milestones behind them. Hopefully we all have more mileage and milestones ahead. My personal milestone of the moment is a job change. This month, December, 2008, is my last month in the employment of the CMA. I have worked with no other organization since August, 1986. Twenty-Two years and four months. I have logged far far far more tham 222,222.2 miles in those years. We have led churches in two states domestically, and planted three churches in two different countries in three different languages abroad. But now it is time to move on to a larger vision and hopefully more milestones. I'll be sure to send you more pictures along the way.

BBQ GA style

There are many cultural ways to eat, not to mention a million different cultural foods. In Russia the thing was peroshkies, and in Macedonia it is Ajvar or Lutenitsa. The South is no exception, neither in culinary arrogance nor in specialties. One of the local favorite haunts is Zebs.




You would not be impressed with the decor. It is the utmost in utilitarianism. It is a celebration in Southern simplicity. A worship service of minimalism - the Brinks would love it. It is the ultimate no frills no chills design.



But the food is divine, in a good ole boy, country boy sorta way. It is plain eating done well. Tender, spicy and filling (the three main roles of food in this part of the world) and frankly it is a one of a kind experience to go and have BBQ at Zebs. You have to have an adventuresome spirit to embrace the experience :-)

Here is a photo of my meal . . .
























That is BBQ pork, or "pulled pork" as they would say up in PA where I live at the moment, cole slaw, and Brunswick stew (a Southeastern delicacy, which is a thick vegetable-meat stew). While I will admit it is not much to look at, the taste is top-notch, kinda like most American's who look at Macedonian Avjar think it looks awful, but once sampled, never find anything quite as satisfying.

So on this trip to see my folks, my dad treated us today to this great local piece of culture and cuisine. I am still savoring the experience. Jesus is the same though; He is an unrepeatable flavor, an irreplaceable taste, and unforgettable experience and contextualized piece of heaven to the senses. As He well should be. Jesus is uuuummmmmm.