making music or history?

We went to the New Year concert of the National Philharmonic Orchestra last night. Johann Strauss never sounded so good. It was glorious! Close your eyes and it was more than easy to feel like you were in some large ballroom in Vienna in 1839. It was very moving. I have listened to classical music most of life (not exclusively of course), but this was the first time I had the opportunity to go to a concert and enjoy the experience live. Wow, what a difference.

I wonder what it would be like to create something that is played, reviewed, read or enjoyed 108 years after I die? Is that making music, or history? I think there is a good lesson here for me. Far far far too much of my daily energy goes toward . . . well, daily momentary temporary activities. Hey you gotta live . . . . But seriously, how do you step back away from the daily grind and see the overriding themes and movements (music remember) of life and our participation in the flow of history, how do you find/get/discover/receive this kind of perspective? I think we all desperately need it.

I am a hacker musician. I lead the worship in our burgeoning church plant here in Skopje. My 12 string guitar is known occasionally for making a beautiful sound, my voice even less so . . . but after last night, I am embarrassed to open the guitar case this morning. Unfortunately, Sunday's coming. So I am more than certain (well as certain as one can be see previous post) that if I make history it will not be with my guitar. It is more likely with my relationships. After the concert 7 of us went out for food and drinks and we sat and talked and sharpened one another until after midnight. I admit that I enjoyed the power and majesty of the concert more than the hard work of listening to people and facilitating them. But if I ever make history, then I need to be able to see that I will never play in the philharmonic orchestra, but . . . its down right weird how much people want to hang out with me. Its probably because they are trying to figure me out because I SO don't fit into any of their boxes, but still that's who I am and I am fairly comfortable in my own skin, long hair, earrings and all.

Now where can I get that perspective I need?