Future-thinking 2

To continue along the lines of the previous post, Marshall Goldsmith blogged about some elements of future-thinking and what he called "forecasting" the environment that we live in, grew up in, and are surrounded by, that influence what we can and cannot change.

This is directly related to future-thinking. You will see the elements line up pretty well. His first encouragement is to . . . 

Anticipate, which is basically my entire last post about this subject. He argues that good leaders and good business folks are all about Anticipating, future-thinking, seeing around the corners before they get here, you follow the drift, in order to . . . 

Avoid. He quotes Drucker, and I am going to quote him quoting Drucker, "Half the leaders I have met don't need to learn what to do.  They need to learn what to stop." Honestly I spend 65% of my time working with clients on this point alone. It seems that far too many of us have drank the kool-aid and believe that we must say yes to every challenge and problem that comes along in order to prove how valuable and irreplaceable we are to the world (and perhaps to ourselves?). This results in the majority of us being bogged down in very good things, while never having the discernment nor margin to do the great things, and accomplish the powerfully significant for the world, for humanity, for God. Stop your delusional belief that you can do it all. No one can. No one ever has. No one ever will. Let this empower you to . . . 

Adjust. Adjust your expectations. Adjust your assessment of your capacity. Adjust your will and talent and skills to the very essential stuff. You get the idea. Adjustments happens most timely and easily when we are focused and forecasting our situation and environment. The entire point of future-thinking in my opinion to to be ready, able and willing to make the adjustments that invariably come along, and will derail us if we aren't prepared.

Future thinking

Yes I had to change locations in order to be inspired enough and to have some mental space in my brain to write this blog. I have strongly advocated such changes in environment to get your creative juices flowing on this blog many times in the past. Today I had to take my own advice.

Because I am visiting the parentals, and one of them is a different person each time they wake up from a nap, and they take several dozens of naps throughout the day! The happy contented person who fell sleep 20 minutes ago, wakes up a sullen unhappy person . . . who falls asleep and then wakes up a completely incapable person who struggles to find the bathroom in the very small house they have lived in for the last 52 years. And no, we did not change the location of the bathroom. This is life with a parent struggling with Alzheimer's and dementia. At least this is how it expresses itself most days. There is no possible way to predict what the next nap will hold for all of us - those of us caring for the comfort and well-being of the said person.

It strikes me that this is also a challenge with future-certainty in any subject. The one topic most people seek my advice on is "what will the future be like, if I make this change or that change in my work or parent group?" I, of course, can give a general trends kind of answer to such a question, but there are no guarantees at all, because of the multiplicity of factors that will effect that precise outcome in the future. And trust me, the factors are far more dependable and predictable in vocational fields than they are in Alzheimers patient's naps results! Yet precise and bankable predictions about where you will end up from the decision you are making today, five years down the road, are frankly impossible.

Future-envisioning is still an important practice though, because if you don't do it with some diligence, you likely will not recognize the factors that ARE within your power to choose, when they come along. As the parentals grow older, more challenged, more in need of my regular appearance and assistance, the more I need to future-envision how I can work and live effectively, while providing the ever-increasing more that they need from me. If you are trying to answer a similarly quandary, the answers you come up will vary from mine, because of the health issues your love ones face, the flexibility of your job/vocation, the resources available, and your location in the world relative to them . . . and at least a dozen other factors that I haven't even future-envisioned yet . . . probably.

But to construct a life-work balance that meets your needs today and tomorrow requires some diligent thinking and inspiration in order to mitigate the risks and maximize the rewards for all stakeholders. 

Advice? Take a long walk, or ride your motorcycle down to the coffee shop, or some other change in environment in the regular course of the day, and think think think, and then think some more. I am confident you will be pleased with the progress you make. 

I gotta finish my coffee now, and do some more thinking . . ..

10 things I learned on this trip

It has been a very concentrated time of travel and learning and people intense weeks as I have been reconnecting with some partners across the USA. Always being "on" is very very draining, yet I feel more energized and energetic than I have in decades! Yes that is a paradox.

A number of these connections and relationships are great for my soul and encourage me very much. A few of them are very draining and exhausting, yet I am learning new ways to mitigate and negate their effects on me. Every time I make a trip, I feel like I learn more and more. This one was no different on that front.

What I learned this time in the States:

1. There is always someone nearby who is smarter than I am and that I can learn from!

2. There is a hunger in most folks to move forward with their lives and to make progress, and they are highly attracted to people who can help them do that.

3. The more you can uncomplicate the complicated for them, the more they are going to pay attention to what you have to say.

4. You better have something of substance to say!

5. Cherish the moments when you can sit on the patio (and not freeze!) and have a cigar!

6. It is never too late in life to make a new friend.

7. People learn faster when they are laughing.

8. Most people want you to make all the application for them and draw all the lines that connect all the dots. Don't.

9. Don't because it robs them of understanding themselves, and diminishes their personal commitment and follow-through to their own success.

10. Stop (or at least slow down enough) to enjoy the beauty along the journey, both the relational ones and the natural ones. Snow in Vermont, warm and wet in Florida, warm and dry and early Spring in California! Priceless!

Unlit candles

Michael Josephson said, "I’ve learned that unless I translate my thoughts into actions, my great ideas and good intentions are like unlit candles." Manchester wrote about Winston Churchill  that he understood that victory could only be won "by the vigorous exercise of his imagination and the imposition of his will by the only means he knew — action, action this day, action every day."

Too many of our good ideas remain just that - ideas. In our crazy modern world we have elevated the "idea" to accomplishment status. In other words, as if the idea itself was a product of value, or of equal work and effort as the end product that actually brings beauty or value to the world.

I too can fall into such a trap where I feel that the idea or the intention was equal or on par with actions, but that is simply not true. They are only unlit candles. More steps are required before I can have any real sense of satisfaction that I have actually produced something innovative or useful. One of the ways that I restrain this tendency to elevate intentions and ideas to the level of actual essential work, is that I ask myself every day, "What value am I providing my clients?" It is a brutal reminder that what I do - action - is the only measurement that carries weight.

Tenacity

Tenacity. What a word. It is the unsung hero of almost every success story in my whole life. I think this is true for most people that I know across the world as well. Oh there are some talented blokes out there, and great idea people, and high energy dudes, and amazing lasses who can and do lead entire countries (ala Merkel). But these people are the very first ones that will describe for you how consistently tenacity is part and parcel of their everyday lives.

As Michael Josephson said in his recent blog "tenacity is more important to success than talent." And ain't that the truth! Most people have talent, don't get me wrong, I am not suggesting that people don't have some amazing talent. But relatively few can commercialize those talents. Most of us have talents that don't ever even cross over into our vocations. Many of us BECOME talented at our vocations precisely because we are tenacious about learning and working hard at it, and finding joy in the process.

I have always been quite put off by people lauding my TALENTS when in fact nothing more than shear hard effort over long periods of time = tenacity, brought about the seemingly effortless product you observed today. My dad was fond of saying and rightly so, that "the easier a person makes the job look, the higher Master he or she is" in whatever field of expertise you are observing. When people ask me to describe myself, and when I trust them enough to be honest, I am a beaver in life . . . gnawing on that tree until it falls down. Tenacity has been far more important in my successes than talent, what about you?

Getting there

On the final leg home after almost seven weeks on the road. Cannot tell you how good the thought of sleeping in my own bed sounds right now. I have an amazing job and I get to do the most interesting work in the world, but the "traveling" part of traveling is waxing very old. Oh I still really enjoy being with new people in new places and experiencing new food and sights and smells and views, but the getting there is usually tough and sometimes very exhausting.

There is a lesson to be learned here as well because traveling is a great metaphor for leadership and development. The getting there is always challenging and fraught with difficulties and things you just would really rather not have to go through. But the destination is almost always worth it. So how do you in your life mitigate or manage the unpleasantness or difficulties or challenges facing you as you move toward your next destination?

Frustrating speakers

There are so many intangibles to effective communication. Even with good coaching I find most public speakers, especially in the church, amazingly frustrating. The number one mistake they make is no cohesiveness from idea to idea. Oh the transition exists in their minds for sure, or they would not have said what they said, but they fail to bring the hearer along with them and connect the dots so to speak, in a way that their points or point is compelling.  More and more it seems that preachers (especially) and speakers that I hear, draw seemingly random points of "proof" or what I refer to as proof texting within the church, to make their argument. What they do in actuality is leave us listeners sitting there with our minds wandering toward our to-do lists or verging off into dazed daydreaming.

They fail to sharpen their communication skills as a tool of choice. They attempt to use blunt force trauma or the charisma of personality to win our minds and that simply is an impossible venture. To win the mind, and eventually the heart, we communicators need weapons-grade skills and honing of the craft of excellent communication. Isn't the message that you are striving to communicate worthy of that effort and refinement? At the very least, respect the content of the message and me as the audience enough to not waste my time.

I love Berlin!

I love Berlin! It is one of my favorite cities in the world, hands down. I would move here in a heartbeat would my sweet wife agree. Alas, that won't happen in this lifetime. Fortunately for me I get to come here often and work and I completely enjoy each one of these visits.  The ease of getting around the city, the clean air, the excellent food and the structuredness of it all makes for a wonderful experience. 

Of course all of those pluses would be for naught were there not excellent work to be accomplished here as well. In fact one of my clients here was brainstorming ways to work more in Berlin! A conversation I throughly enjoyed. Unfortunately I can't be here more than I currently am and that is that. But the people and work and connections I get to enjoy and engage in are as refreshing as the air coming in overland from the North Sea

Christmas gift giving? Gorging in America

I had the unusual opportunity to observe/be present for another family's gift giving process/event. The sheer volume/amount/number of gifts was amazing. Breathtaking. Mind-numbing. Overwhelming. Beyond the ability to be thankful for in any meaningful way. They had a lot of fun in a gorging overeating sort of way. But the mountain of gifts were quickly opened and everyone had their pile of stuff. And I sit here trying to determine if anyone is any happier for it? 

There is no judgment in my assessment, because my clan is going to do something very similar a week from today when we can finally all get under the same roof (today, the actual 25th of December, finds us in three different states). Not only are we going to do the same thing, but my clan loves it! But last year I refused. I gave no gifts. And I liked THAT much better. I want a house full of laughter and good smells, more than stuff, far more than stuff!

But while we have broken free from the slavery of the 25th of December, we have not broken free of the bondage of excess. My favorite book this year is "Essentialism: the diligent pursuit of less but better." and I need to find a way to help the whole family shift to this way of thinking! But now we are shifting from excess of gifts to an excess of food- it's dinner time! And this may be worse than gorging on gifts.

Spaces

There are some great and unusual working spaces in the course of my everyday life that perhaps others don't get to explore. But I think that almost everyone I meet has some kind of unique possibilities, if they would only give it some keen thought and consideration. Mine is airplanes. Enforced sitting for long periods of time, lends itself to sharp periods of boredom unless I have some "work" to think through and engage mentally and "do". I can play a few games and I can watch a hockey game, but that is about the extent of my capacity for lite weight amusement, and then I find my mind hungry for something meatier to bite into. So my special little space in life is airplanes. I often delay certain kinds of work and projects for upcoming flights, simply because they are perfect for the cramped, can't really get up and move around kinds of time stretches, that air travel generally forces on us. So what space is within your grasp that you could shape or use to dig in deep on some thorny problem, some deep challenge, or get some necessary-but-less-than-sexy work accomplished? I bet you can do this, and make a pointless dead spot turn productive. Pulling for your success.

(I also work and play hard at making this dead spot in life a productive place. I am always testing and trying new tools, hardware and software, to make this more productive and more interesting. For this blog today I was using an iphone 6 plus in landscape, typing on an iwerkz bluetooth keyboard, and on the software/app side of things, I used Drafts.)

I love Christmas!

I love Christmas! Of course I love the fact that it is Advent and that without Christ come in the flesh we have nothing. We are nothing without that monumental event.

But I love just regular old pagan Western Christmas too. I love the way gift giving sharpens our focus and attention on those we care deeply about, actually enhancing that care considerably. I love the highly repetitious annual Christmas songs every store plays. I love the energy with which things are happening. I love the crowds of people and I love the atmosphere and energy.

Most people think I am crazy, but I love Christmas and try to reproduce many of those elements in the teams I work with and the people I lead. In fact Christmas personifies the energy and attitude that I feel most days while working! Now you are certain I am crazy :-). That is ok, I know most people don't like their work, but I do.  I get to work with interesting people and fascinating situations all the time. And if you think I like my work, then you should meet my wife. She would pay them money to get to do her job!

So yes I love Christmas and think every day should be Christmas, and thankfully most days are close.

a 300 pound manual

It's late in the afternoon. My dad is sitting there, with a 300 pound car manual in front of him, meticulously and carefully detailing all the intricacies of gasoline motors. He is looking for minuscule and microscopic information about why his lifters are "rattling" in his newly rebuilt 289 hot rod engine. Reading is a big chore for my dad. The reason is, that when he completed the eighth grade, that was the last year he went to any kind of formal school. He is a slow reader. And it's just like it digging a ditch for him – hard manual labor.

The point being here, is that my 74-year-old father, even though it's not easy or fun, continues to dig in and learn. There is a great lesson therein for all of us. You are neither too old, nor to handicapped, ever, to learn. Even though he only has an eighth-grade education, the reality is he has the mind of an engineer, and always has. You can see it by his creations, a solid dozen of them over the last 25 years, All from scratch, all from nothing-rusty-holes in a bucket of bolts, into beautiful shiny amazing hot rods that are highly desirable and in high demand.

Thus the second lesson to be learned, that you can't really create something beautiful and amazing, unless you're willing to learn, sharpen, retool, reach beyond where you are today. You can't innovate, build, develop something beautiful and desirable and needed and wanted, unless you are willing to dig in deep and always be humble and always be learning.

And even though I have my doctorate (in large part also due to dad), I find myself at almost 53 years of age learning more than I ever learned at any point in my entire life. And even though doctoral students often joke that they know more and more about less and less, (and there is some truth to that), it's a great stage of life to be where I'm at today was such a good model in front of me, urging me on to learn more and more every day.

Cafe-bar change up!

There are many "offices" available in the modern Western world, and some of them can even provide a high energy atmosphere or ambience for work, to help you be more creative, innovative or simply a great change of pace from your normal space.

Space/environment is critical to producing certain types of work. Sometimes I need I NEED quiet and intense focus. For a particular kind of "flow" or "zone" to occur, I usually need this quiet and focus (sans distractions) to get into a great flow or to resolve a particularly thorny problem or to crush a difficult task. Other times, I like the energy and liveliness of a cafe bar to enable my brain to make unusual connections or jumps that don't usually happen in the low distraction of my office setup.

Sometimes simply people-watching is enough to get my creative juices pumping and flowing, imagining their lives and their situations and their dramas. Life is the difficult pieces that are hard and less than ideal, whereas the easy and fun stuff is more like just the icing on a tasty cake for me. The texture and challenge of the tougher parts is what makes life living and enjoyable. Without the challenging we quickly fall into boredom and less than interesting. A problem free life is nothing that anyone ever has, first of all, nor would it be very interesting second of all.

Of course solving problems for myself helps me solve problems that others are facing. The beauty of age is that I have had the opportunity to do my fair share of problem solving. It is called experience and it is almost always negative in some fashion. How we approach it and perceive it determines if the negative rules or is merely a portion of the overall experience. Changing our working space regularly is a good reminder and helper in realizing that one reality is not the only reality. While I don't want to work every night in the cafe-bar, tonight it is a good time to realize that there is a whole big wide world of difference out there, and every problem can be view/resolved from an almost infinite number of ways and possibilities @ Play Cafe Skopje

Virtually yours

Buying a house while traveling to Europe? Well it is aaa serious juggling act I can tell you that for sure. I have done some crazy things in the past. In fact the last house that I purchased, I did sight unseen, actually never laying eyes on the physical place until six months after I had already purchased it. Did it all, every single bit of it, on the advice and recommendation of a friend . . . who also signed all the documents in my name!

Today I am trying the same thing in a different way.  I am placing a bid on a house in one state, while flying through two others, on my way to two other countries, all happening over the internet through a VPN, while never actually physically signing anything. This is just another side to the virtual world I live in all the time and the virtual work I accomplish every week. Most of my meetings and most of my work happens on the web, not in person. Virtually buying a house may just be the logical normal next step for a virtual president and CEO like myself.

Virtually yours, David

Rigor mortis

They have been sucking all the air out of the room for weeks! The challenges of working from my parents home are proving formidable. This was not true in the past, but it certainly is now. End of life scenarios run amuck in their presence. They have planned out their funerals, purchased their burial plots, committed themselves to rigor mortis, or rather a rigorous schedule of eating at precise times, certain foods, certain practices, all the confidence that these rigors will give structure and stability at a point in life that has none of those  certainties. It is difficult to watch, difficult to help, and difficult to bear - and all the while knowing that I am right behind them and wishing for my end to be different. That is what I mean by sucking all the air out of the room.

It is so overwhelming that it leaves no moments to think, to reflect in quiet, it is all too loud and noisy and boisterous even, to have some focus and clarity. It says far too much that I have to get on an airplane and cruise at 39k feet in order to find some thinking time, some reflecting time, some clarity time. 

We are all moving this same direction. Everyone before us has passed through these doors to eternity - our physical bodies coming to a place invariably where they refuse/cannot function any longer. No one is 100% certain of how our bodies and our souls can function without one another, none of us have ever yet had that experience, but it is coming, that is for certain. My brother believes when your physical body closes down, can't go any longer, regardless of the reason, then you simply cease to exist as a person. That is the END of all meaning and END of all existence in any form other than as fertilizer for the earth. 

But that simply is not the experience of the historical Jesus. And as Death's destroyer, He gives us hope and a future, even though I can't tell you or explain to you all the mechanics and physics of HOW it will happen, I simply do not have enough information nor am I smart enough to understand it even if I had it, to satisfy your curiosity (or mine). This historical Jesus is the One where I am placing my trust, in Him who broke the power of Death over us, and yes it can take us temporarily, but not eternally, and no I don't know how or why. Even 30 plus years as a theologian, and I still cannot explain it in a way that will satisfy the vast majority. I trust Him. My brother calls it "feelgoodism" and a "crutch" and a "desperateattempttohavehopewherethereisnone" among other things. I prefer to call it trust. "Trust is the evidence of things hoped for, the confidence of things not seen."

Goodbyes

There are always goodbyes and more goodbyes in our lives. It is simply a life of goodbyes, and I regularly tell newbies this when they are thinking about coming to our neck of the woods, or when they arrive. No sense in painting it as anything else. In a word, it is the highest regular price extracted of International Workers in my opinion.

This last week has been an oasis in life, hanging with the grand baby and two of the three kids, seeing them everyday, participating in their lives, making memories and having fun together. But the goodbye can always hang there in the corner of a cloudless sky if you don't take care to enjoy THIS moment, to enjoy THIS memory, to make this second count. The future is always, and never, there, to be encountered eventually. 

So tomorrow I will crank the bike up, and drive away . . .  as I have done countless times before, or said goodbye at some obscure airport in some hairy armpit of the world, or left them at boarding school, or flew away without them, and say goodbye. Then the countdown will begin until we can see them again. It is a life of goodbyes.

The thing I noticed today was . . .

Today is my first day in America on this particular trip and my son invited me to go with him while he accomplished a bunch errands, shopping and about town. I always love such invitations, and of course I said yes. Plus I needed to recharge my American phone chip to use while I am in the states, so accomplishing multiple things on one trip is always good, right?

So the thing that caught my attention today was that every single store, every single one, challenged/invited/requested us to join their bonus card, their discount card, their brand card, to get all their discounts, bonuses, and well, their stuff at a cheaper price. In fact, and this is gonna sound weird, I hate shopping at my two favorite (I already told you that this was gonna sound weird) grocery stores in the states, because every single price posted, demands that you have their "card" in order to get that posted price.

A much better way to get my commitment to their store, a devotion to their brand, is to simply give me that special price to begin with, without all the extra I-can-now-track-all-your-purchases mechanisms that they force us to do. This enforced process LOWERS my commitment and my devotion to them. Does not in any way enhance my shopping experience, nor has it ever a single time made me want to return and spend my resources in their particular store.

Those who make the shopping experience one that I want to repeat over and over, make it extra simple and straight forward. There is no "if you have our special discount piece of paper" price enticements or processes. If you want to build a long term relationships with me, think about my experience, not your desire to track me in some fashion.

High on earplugs

I have taken to ear plugs in a grand fashion. "Almost everything is noise" Greg McKeown said, and he was right in more ways than he knew. Not only have I taken to wearing ear plugs in such a way that I frequently have them with me ALL DAY, but I have now crossed an ocean (different oceans) 12 times without watching one single show on the entertainment screen in front of me. What did that cost the airline? Something like $10,000 per seat. All wasted on me, because almost everything is noise.

Here is the McKeown quote, "The prevalence of noise: Almost everything is noise, and a very few things are exceptionally valuable. This is the justification for taking time to figure out what is most important." Followed by an equally good one from John Maxwell, “You cannot overestimate the unimportance of practically everything.”

For transparency sake here, let me state that I do download and watch American Ninja Warrior and The Voice, because otherwise I would have nothing about which to talk to my brother and he is addicted to both of these shows and I like them fine too. I also am a huge hockey fan and watch games every week, and thank God regularly that the hockey season is nine months long :-). But that is it. No movies, no drama shows, no game shows, no TV in general, because it is all noise. 

The additional effect of the muting, that comes from the ear plugs, makes for a much quieter world, a world where you can think, a world where you must decide to be responsible for your life, a world where the frenetic noise of entertainment does not allow you a free pass. You have to choose what you do with your life, or someone else will.

Help at 4:22 am

I travel. I travel alot! It is practically a weekly activity for me. Needless to say I have missed my share of flights and connections. It happened again this week, even though I did everything humanly possible to prevent it, including running two kilometers through two airports, asking for help all along the way, trying to enlist every Turkish Airline employee I could, fruitlessly in the end, because I still missed my flight, by less than three minutes.

Fast forward two and half hours, I finally, finally, finally get to the hotel that the airline provided me, and then was informed by the front desk that I would have to be ready to go at 0400 hours back to the airport!! For a 8:00 am departure????  No thank you. I  told them firmly that I would find my own way to the airport. Since I visit Istanbul many times each year, I am well versed in how to get around on my own. I wanted no wake up call, and I would bear all the consequences for getting my own self to the airport.

I got to my room, and unplugged the phone just in case they did not get how serious I was. There was no way on earth I wanted a 0330 wake up call!  I set the alarm for 5:30 and went to sleep. Imagine my rude awakening at 0422 hours when someone was pounding on my door. They would not stop. They continued on and on. I finally got up and yelled, "what do you want?!?!?" The persons on the other side of the door informed me that the bus downstairs was waiting for me and that they frantically needed to leave NOW!  I told them to go on of course, and went back to bed . . . but the damage was done, I could not go back to sleep.

This is not the kind of help I need when traveling, but it is the kind of help that the Turkish culture is required to give. It is help, but not actually helpful. We do the same all the time, telling the truth without regard for how it will be received, talking about people not present in order to "help" the person dealing with them, or any other time that we decide what is best for someone without regard for their wishes. Sure there are exceptions to this rule, but not very many at all. Help at 0422 hours is not really help.

The energy and the power

World class cities have a energy that is very unique. Istanbul is a city of around 12 million jammed crammed people on endless rolling hills, awesome horrible traffic, a million refugees, no parking places, and sea of asphalt and cement. And it hums and it thrums with a powerful energy that comes from all this humanity, all this potential, all these possibilities thrown together in one small landmass. Yet it is relatively safe and unthreatening as world class cities go.

But there is so little chance that someone who lives here will meet a Christ-follower. There is almost no witness. There is practically no opportunity to hear Truth, to meet God on neutral ground, to choose Life everlasting, to read the scriptures, to hear His voice in the roar of the crowds and in the masses of humanity that vibrate with the pursuit of everything else and all other.

What if we rose up and responded with an equal energy, a response of love and compassion and redemption that was rooted in our daily powerful experience with Yahweh, the creator who pulses with power and light and clarity and love? It seems to be hard to find such people of character and competence and compassion, who will live the Kingdom dream rather than the Western dream or their personal ones.