Monday, July 09, 2018

Everybody is dying it seems

You go through stages in life, although it does not feel that way when you are going through them, it just feels like . . . living at that moment. But the older you get, the more perspective and context you gain, to look back and see the stages. For instance I am fond of saying that  I have been married to three versions the same woman - meaning I have only and always been married to Brenda, but she/us/together have been through at least three stages in life.

This current stage of life (not Brenda) seems to be the death stage. Not my own, although that is more than possible at any time, but those solid and formative people of my life are dying. And it "feels" like all my friends and clients and coworkers are experiencing the same thing, and so it seems like a tsunami of deaths and more deaths. 

Just yesterday, my colleague and I started this trip to Spain together, and between the two of us, we experienced four deaths of close friends and/or family members! All before we even got on the plane for Madrid, even though we did not know it at the time. We received this news later in the day, but it tore the fabric of ours lives nonetheless.

Sure this is an inevitability for everyone if they live long enough, but I always thought this was an experience to wrestle with far out into the future, like in my 70's or 80's . . . but evidently you can start this stage well and good in your 50's. I reckon we can let it be fuel for depression and emotional fractures, or we can let it be fuel to bring our best selves to every moment today.